Ashley
An Inspiring Journey of Self-Worth and Connection
Success Story
"I am worthwhile. People do like me."
Ashley, age 26, learned about Find Love Safely from her therapist who works with young adults on the autism spectrum. “She gave us the contact information and showed us some videos and news clips,” said Ashley.
Both Ashley and her parents were excited. “When she finished a transitional program at Wayzata schools, her world kind of shrank,” explained her dad, Tim. “It was really hard to get out and meet kids her age.”
Ashley says she would like to have a boyfriend, and she appreciates the opportunities she has had to meet several members through Find Love Safely. So far, Ashley and her parents have arranged dates for Ashley with four young men.
Match #1: Kevin
Ashley’s mom Julie spoke with Kevin’s mom, who suggested they all meet at Panera for their first date. “I was actually kind of nervous, because I had never done this before,” said Ashley. “But he was really cool. He has a good personality and he was funny.”
Ashley said he is also very caring and kind. Between dates, Kevin and Ashley talked and texted. “He would always ask me, ‘How was your day? How are you doing?’”
They both expressed interest in getting together again, and Julie suggested dinner and swimming in the family’s pool. “We talked about a lot of stuff, like the kind of Christian music he likes, and their eight collies.” Kevin’s mom breeds collies, which is why they have so many dogs. They also talked about Kevin’s job. “He was working at a restaurant, but now he has a job at a warehouse.”
Next, Ashley and Kevin went to the Minnesota Zoo together. “We saw all the animals, and we went to a sea lion show,” said Ashley. “On the third or fourth date, I started joking with him, opening myself up a little more.” They also have gone walking and bowling. Ashley said the zoo was her favorite date.
Match #2: Derek
Ashley’s second match was with Derek, whose family lives a distance away. “We talked about a halfway point to meet, and decided on dinner at Redstone in Maple Grove,” said Julie.
Ashley’s first impression of Derek? “He’s really easy to talk to. He likes to do a lot of fun, different things.” They talked about their families. “Derek has an older sister who has twins, and he talked about his lake cabin. He likes to go four-wheeling.”
Derek came over to Ashley’s house for dinner and swimming, and they have also gone on a walk and went shopping together at Southdale. Ashley was attracted to his “fun personality. I want to keep seeing him. We’re going to the State Fair next.”
"He’s really easy to talk to. He likes to do a lot of fun, different things."
- Ashley
Match #3: Danny
Ashley’s next match was with Danny. The families decided to meet at Ashley’s house for swimming. “They had a good time talking, playing games and swimming,” said Julie.
“I don’t see Danny a lot because he’s really busy,” said Ashley. She said he was shy, “but he’s really good to talk to. He’s a good person. I feel like can tell him stuff and he’s very understanding.”
Ashley and Danny talked a lot about sports. “We’re both Minnesota Wild fans. He’s into sports, like the Vikings, Timberwolves, Wild, and Frost. He’s into college sports, too.” They have chatted by phone and seen each other twice.
"He’s really good to talk to. He’s a good person. I feel like can tell him stuff and he’s very understanding."
- Ashley
Match #4: Matty
Ashley’s fourth match was with Matty, who she has seen only once. The families met at the Good Earth restaurant.
“He was really shy,” said Ashley. “He goes to college in Vermont. He’s very smart.” Knowing he would be leaving soon for college, Matty was looking for somebody he could develop a friendship with by phone, and see what happens over time.
Ashley’s first impression? “He’s very handsome. I only met him once, so I don’t know much about him yet. But I would like to see him again.” She plans to keep in touch with Matty by phone and see what happens.
Final Thoughts
Before Find Love Safely, Ashley wondered, “How can I meet some guys? Am I ever going to find somebody?” She said she appreciates the opportunity to meet people and see if it could develop into something more.
“We have been just thrilled with this organization,” said Julie. “It’s been something that just kind of opened her up. At first, she was really nervous.” After a few dates, it has been easier to relax and be herself.
Ashley agrees. “I’m very outgoing, and I try not to change my whole attitude; to be myself.”
Julie and Tim were asked about the best outcome for Ashley of her experiences with Find Love Safely. “It’s given her a sense of peace and calm,” said Julie. “Just to see her joy and happiness at having this opportunity. She has seen that there are people who are excited and interested to meet her.”
Ashley said: “I am worthwhile. People do like me.”
Tim added: “There are lots of nice young men out there.”
Ashley concluded: “I am just thankful for Find Love Safely. I never thought I would find guys to date. I would go for years thinking, ‘Why can’t I have a boyfriend?’ It was just a lack of opportunity.”
"It’s given her a sense of peace and calm,” said Julie. “Just to see her joy and happiness at having this opportunity. She has seen that there are people who are excited and interested to meet her."
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